Mother of the Year

When we took Oliver in to the vet on Monday, I had had a pretty bad feeling all day, mostly because of all the comments some of you experienced dog people had left. Worst case scenario I was expecting an expensive and drawn out process to get rid of Oliver's condition. Never in my worst nightmare did I think we would be taking the dog in to its death that day. If I had known that I certainly wouldn't have taken all my kids to the vet with me!!!

The vet was trying to talk to me in code, so the kids wouldn't understand the severity of the dog's condition. She kept emphasizing how bad the problem was, kept beating around the bush, saying there was no treatment that could cure him, etc, but never would actually come out and say the word 'euthanize'. Finally I said, "So what you're saying is that the most merciful thing we can do for Oliver is to put him to sleep?"

At this all the children started crying, and then I started crying. Even Zoya, who I'm sure didn't understand a word of what was happening, burst into tears at the sight of the rest of us crying. Even the vet, I think, might have shed a little tear. (I wonder what the people in the waiting room were thinking!) It was a pitiful sight indeed. Suddenly the vet started winking at me, and said, "OR.....I have another idea"....(still winking)......."Why don't you let me call a Lab Rescue Foundation to see if we can re-home him....Surely we can find a dog lover who would take Oliver and do whatever it takes to make him healthy again."

The kids started nodding their heads, through their tears. YES, that is what they wanted to do. We all said our tearful goodbye's to him, and I signed the paper to send him to his "New Home".

That seemed like a grand plan until later that evening when everybody was worried sick about what kind of home Oliver would go to. What if he goes to someone who won't take care of him again? They were SO angry at the first owner who robbed Oliver of a good and happy life. They fantasized all kinds of ways to pay back that owner for what he/she had done to poor Little Ollie.

THEN Liesel found the receipt from the vet. What is euthanasia? she asked. And why did they charge us for a burial? Oh boy. So I gathered everyone together and I told them the truth about Oliver and about how the poor vet wanted to be merciful to us by letting us think he didn't have to die. At the end of the day they were glad I told them, and we could all sleep peacefully that night knowing Oliver didn't ever have to suffer again.

That vet, Dr. Franz, bless her heart, had great compassion on us that afternoon. She vowed to personally find us another perfect canine match. Stay tuned!

Meanwhile, if bringing home a mangy, dying dog to be the family pet didn't win me Mother of the Year Award, maybe this next one will:

My son has been complaining of headaches frequently when he is asked to read or do schoolwork. I KNEW it couldn't be vision problems, because he has always tested better than perfect on his vision screenings, 20/15 to be exact. And it couldn't be migraines because it is only 'triggered' by schoolwork. And he couldn't be far-sighted because that is just for old people. So the only logical explanation is that he is trying to get out of school work, right? That is what I've been telling him for three months anyway. Just to be absolutely sure, I took him to the eye doctor. Ooops! He is far-sighted after all.

Doesn't he look handsome in his new glasses? Today I let him skip school altogether. I suppose that was my way of saying I'm sorry.

Oliver-A short and sad chapter in the lives of the Urbans

So we decided to call him Oliver. That was the first name that came to mind when I saw him, and exactly five of you thought he was a perfect Oliver too. An older disabled gentleman had rescued him from a very bad situation and was looking for a good family for him and that is how he ended up here. 

When we took him to the vet today she said it was definitely not a severe flea rash as the gentleman had told us but demodectic mange, a noncontagious immune condition affecting the skin condition caused by mites. When it is found early it is treatable but in Oliver's case it was systemic and so severe that it is very painful and completely untreatable. She said we could give him steroids to alleviate his pain but then his immunity would be weakened and the condition would worsen. She said he has likely lived in pain for a very long time. When she examined his teeth she said it appeared that he had spent a lot of hours chewing on the chain he was tied to. :( Poor sweet boy!

We thought that with enough love and TLC we could save Oliver and nurture him back to health but sadly it was too late. Oliver spent the weekend having fun at the Urban farm and is running around chasing balls with Bliss in Doggy Heaven this evening.

There were sure some tears shed around here today.  It's surely not the blog post I intended to write today! Poor Sweet Oliver. At least he was loved, even if for just a weekend and a day.

Adopting again!

So I wanted to make a crazy post, about how we were adopting again, and how it was a 2 1/2 year old boy with special needs. But then I remembered that both of my grandmas sometimes read my blog, and I was afraid one of them might have a heart attack from the news.

So instead I will just introduce you to the newest member of the Urban family, who remains nameless at the moment. He did not come to us, we sought him out. The kids wanted a boy to even things out a bit, and to give Nellie a playmate. They also specifically did not want a puppy, "because everybody wants a puppy". They wanted a dog that would maybe have a hard time finding a home. Sound familiar?

He is covered in a rash and his skin is discolored from a severe flea infestation, but we hope to see him blossom into the beautiful yellow lab that he was created to be. He is skinny, and sweet, and so far is getting along fine with everyone. Even Zoya who was terrified of Nellie for the first six weeks she was here, warmed right up to him. He smells 100% better after a bath.

We need some help finding him a name. Any suggestions? Other than Fleabag?

Lookie here...Andrea is People Magazine's Hero of the Year!

Way to go, Andrea! Our family is proud to have been a tiny part of it all.

Cleft palate consultation- a post about Zoya

We met with a cleft palate team today for Zoya and we have decided we are going to WAIT at least a year or two to before we attempt surgery.

First of all, we were surprised to find out that it appears a partial repair of the soft palate had already been done at some point. Perhaps when she had her lip repaired? The doctor explained that this was the most important part of the process anyway. He said that right now surgery would present more risks than benefits, simply because of how big the hole is and how malnourished she is. The hole in the roof of her mouth is a significant one, which means she would need to have a lot of existing tissue to extract from other places in her mouth. Sadly, she doesn't have enough existing mouth tissue to complete it now. The doctor feels that for the time being we can get her fitted with an obturator, or retainer, which would temporarily close up the hole so that she can begin to learn proper speech and eating habits while we fatten her up. Then after she gains 10 pounds or so, she will most likely be a candidate for surgery. He said that basically they only have one 'chance' to do it right and he wanted to set her up to be successful. Right now she is about 11 pounds she needs to gain to even plot on the growth chart! We have a long ways to go. We also met a speech therapist who prepared us for the reality of longterm speech issues.

Meanwhile, her eating continues to be a struggle. It seems the more comfortable she gets around us, the more she refuses to eat. She does like it when we feed her like a baby so for now we have resorted to making airplane motions with the spoon to get her to eat. Sigh. I have never EVER had a kid that doesn't want to eat, so this is a foreign concept to me. I haven't wanted to weigh her because frankly I'm afraid of what I will find out! However, we have noticed her ribs seem to be filling out a little bit, and a couple of the kids have mentioned her tummy seems to be 'a little fatter'. Should I weigh her? Maybe I should.

I was a little stressed thinking about winter coming up and not knowing how to dress Zoya. Her waist is about a size 3 MONTHS and her length is a 3T. My sweet friend Melanie volunteered her sweet mother who custom made several pairs of pants for her. She was THRILLED to have pants that we didn't have to pin in the back or that she didn't have to constantly pull up. I honestly don't think this girl has ever even owned clothes that fit her right. It is going to be a good winter! Thanks Mrs. F.!

Knowing there is likely a mouth surgery in Zoya's near future, we have been trying to help her break her habit of sticking her ENTIRE fist in her mouth for extended periods of time. I had tried everything I could think of.

Leave it to a 12 year old boy to think of this:

Simeon tried to tell Zoya about mouth germs but obviously she has no idea what mouth germs are. Google to the rescue!

Now all we have to say is "Germs!" and she pulls her hand right out of her mouth. Thank you google.

I sure love these boys. I saw them walking back from throwing softballs to Nellie in the pond and I had to run grab my camera. 

I love how they purposely step in the horse manure just cause they're wearing boots and they CAN. A girl would never do that.

All weekend Hope kept reminding me it was "pippy day" at school on Tuesday. I finally informed her this morning that it is actually HIPPY day. She had so many questions about hippies. What did they wear? Were hippies nice to each other? Did they speak the same language that we do today? I found the cutest little hippy dress in a stash of our cousin's hand-me downs. Thanks Elle!

In the comments someone asked why Hope goes to school while the rest of the older kids homeschool. The answer to that is that she  has been watching her siblings go to school for so many years she wanted her turn. There was really no deep thought or prayer that went into the decision, she just was excited to go to kindergarten and so we let her. I am sure we may eventually homeschool her too. 

Today Ava wrote 29 Thank you notes to her Mini Laps Sponsors. She was cracking me up, she kept licking the markers in between cards. If you are getting a thank you note, I'm sure you are glad I told you that! It took 4 of us to write these notes (5 if you count the one taking the photos!)

Please forgive me if you donated and I have seen you or talked to you in the last few weeks and I haven't mentioned anything. We only got the list of donors TODAY. We were blown away at some of the names of people who donated. Some we hardly knew. Wow, you guys are the best.

The 3 littlest ones go to bed at 7:30ish and we try to have a peaceful 'family' time after that. Obviously the whole family can't be in on the 'peaceful' part of our family time, but this is one way we have tried to balance out everybody's needs. Sometimes it's chore night, sometimes family movie night, sometimes family devos or worship. Tonight it was family reading night.

Don't you miss the days when you could take your kids' pictures without them commanding you to not post them on facebook? It's a good thing my kids don't read my blog huh?

I picked this book for Liesel up at the library at 4:00 this afternoon.  By the time she went to bed tonight she was already 3/4 of the way through it. The girl amazes me. I was never a reader. I mean NEVER.

In fact she has inspired me to read Animal Farm and 1984 not because I HAVE to, but because I can. I wonder if I can make it through before it has to be returned to the library in 2 weeks.

Hope is reading Dick and Jane to her dad while he goofs around with his new iPad Zoya's iPad speech device. What a cheater!

A 200 Yard Joy Ride

I took this picture from the bus stop. As you can see the school is literally across the street from the end of our road. Kind of silly that I drive to the end of the road to wait for the school bus when I could just as easily drive across the street and pick Hope and Joseph up at the curb.

So why don't I just drive across the street to pick them up from the school?

Because I have a little boy who climbed up into the Fed Ex truck last week and wouldn't come out until I came in after him. And I have a little girl who loves her brother a lot and who volunteered to sit with him and supervise him. All for the joy of riding in a massive yellow vehicle......

......a 200 yard joy ride but a joy ride nonetheless.