Sunday, June 20, 2010

Bandaids, hugs, and water hoses

It is beginning to feel a little bit like Groundhog Day, the movie, around here. Same routine every day. Ham, eggs and toast for breakfast, ham and cheese sandwiches for lunch, a two hour visit with Joseph, pasta with ham and cheese for dinner (or TGIFridays) Start all over again.

So pardon me if my posts are redundant.

Here Joseph is on the swing with his friend Lilya. She is just a month older, has Down syndrome, and was saved from the mental institution just in the nick of time by her adoptive parents, the Zoromskis who just passed court and will return for her in a week or two.

In Ava's region the children from the baby house are transferred at age 4 but at this orphanage the children are blessed to be able to stay until they are 6. Joseph, and Lilya, will both be 6 in the fall. Lilya's mama told me how humbling it was to receive pictures of Lilya from her file, the file which was being put together for her transfer in August.

The Baby House houses children of all kinds from birth to age 6. Then, from what I understand, the healthy children are then transferred to an internat, or orphanage for older children and the disabled children are sent to mental institutions. I believe, although I am not positive, that the HIV+ children go to a special internat just for HIV+ kids.

As I've mentioned before, Joseph has been blessed to be in such a nice place, but he would not have been here much longer. We are so honored to be able to give him a home and a family before it is too late.
Today I put bandaids on his knees, and he patiently watched me, then ripped both bandaids off and handed them to me. Oh well, it was nice to feel like his mother even for a little bit.

When I look at these photos that I post, I realize it must appear that it is totally natural for us to be here parenting this boy. In reality, we feel very much like we are playmates for now, and not much like parents. Keep in mind we are strangers in this place. We do not know the boundaries or the rules, and we cannot understand each other. As I mentioned before Joseph obeys his nannies very well but he does not listen to us! Who can blame him though? He can't understand a word we are saying!

Nevertheless, we do enjoy our 'playtime' with him, and are looking forward to the day when we can really do things our own way, and not worry about what the rules are and who is watching us.

Afternoon play dates are my favorite, can you see why?

We have tried bringing bubbles, balls, balloons, cars, and play-dough to our visits, and Joseph is not interested in any of them! He wants to play with one thing and one thing only. The water hose. We did turn the hose on one day for him, just a small trickle, and let him water the flowers and wet himself a little. He was in heaven!!

Shortly afterward the nannies came running and hollering "Nyet!! Nyet!" 

So every day we have to have the same conversation with Joseph....that "Nyet, Nyet",  he can't play in the water hose here in this place, but that when he gets home, to his forever family, he has two big brothers waiting for him there who will do lots of big brother things, and that water hoses are on the top of their list too!


Gretchen said...

Ah...a water hose. What a day that will be. It's warming up again down here, I'm thinking water hoses sound pretty good myself. How much longer to you have before he can run freely in that hose?

It was nice meeting you.

Pan Cratius said...

We stand by hoping for good news that you might receive tomorrow, Monday.

Justine said...

Great pictures and great descriptions of you time there. It gives me a tiny idea of what you are going through. I am praying for you! Joseph and Tim are going to get along great with their love of water!

Christine said...

Charissa, this is my favorite post so far! Water hoses are such a simple pleasrue-- too bad they don't let the kids play.

markay714 said...

Hang in there. It will pass and the fun will begin! He's going to LOVE running through a sprinkler.

I picked Daniel and Maria up in October, but it was hot. I let them take off their hats and coats and we got yelled out....the word sounded very distincly like "VIOLATION".....Hats and coats went back on!!

Sort of interested in that "wink" in the post!

Anonymous said...

Jacob (Milos from Serbia, adopted last December) LOVES the hose as well. It is, by far, his favorite "Toy". He loves it on, and even if we stick to the "no water now", he will play with the hose. He just learned how much fun it is to squirt people with the hose.
We (our entire family...I shared with hubby, hoping to awaken the "let's go get another one" feeling in him) LOVE your blog, and all of the pictures. Joseph looks a lot like Jacob, especially skin color.
Praying for you daily!
Mary Stolz

Anonymous said...

Aw, what a sweet boy. I found our time in the orphanage totally uncomfortable and in some ways difficult to bond when you have strangers poking their heads in at you screaming in a language you don't understand. We got yelled at so much, I was sure they thought I was a horrible mother. It will feel so good to have him in your custody and do things your way!

Lisa Rovenstine said...

We love you guys and are so happy for you!

Thanks for keeping us up to date.

Huge hugs!

JennyH said...

I love the one with you snuggling with him and he's sucking his thumb. SO cute!! Looks like you guys are really bonding.

Lisa Comella said...

My fav of course is you holding that one! My Daniel's FAVORITE toy is the hose too. We have a million toys and all he wants is the hose. I can't wait until he is home with you and can play with it all he wants!!

Arizona mom to eight said...

They are very beautiful pictures though, I understand the playmate aspect of meeting our children. For the longest time it felt like I was babysitting them even after they came home, I cannot recall how long it took before I just felt like they had been here forever. However, it feels like babysitting when you have a newborn a little too, getting used to a new person living with you, adjusting.

Waiting with baited breath for adoption day news.

Alice said...

I remember one of Andreas' caretakers clucking at Dan and correcting him as he tried to pronounce A's name which is impossible for an American to do correctly. It made me want to change his name to Zack, just to remind her I could.:) It was hard to feel like I had to play by someone else's rules, especially when I didn't even know the rules.

Joseph sure is handsome! I can't wait for him to learn what parents really are!